Yo Ho Ho, Merry Christmas!

SETTING: The family is watching Pirates of the Carribbean on Christmas night.

MARTHA'S BROTHER-IN-LAW:
I wish I was a pirate. How cool would that be? Are there still even pirates out there?

But then again I'm the most seasick person I know.

If I were a pirate I'd be like the master pirate... like surfing the web and planning and telling the other pirates what to do. Like the marketing pirate. You know -- like pirate direct mail, maybe put together a pirate calendar, that kind of thing.

Sweet.

Merry Gin Day 2006 Edition: Jesus is the Reason for the Season

Original Post Here.

Setting: In-laws' condo in Vermont. Late on Christmas night. Martha Who, Husband, In-laws are in living room. It is quiet. Brother-in-Law enters from kitchen with a fresh gin and tonic for himself and one for Mr. MarthaWho.

MARTHA'S BROTHER-IN-LAW:
Here you go. (handing G&T to Mr. MW)

MR. MARTHAWHO:
Thanks, Man. What is this I'm drinking?

MARTHA'S BROTHER-IN-LAW:
It's a gin and tonic.

MR. MARTHAWHO:
Sweet. Thanks. Haven't had one of these since high school.

MARTHA'S BROTHER-IN-LAW:
You know how to party, man. Merry Gin Day.

(he raises his glass and they both drink)

MARTHA'S BROTHER-IN-LAW:
Ahhhh gin. Like Jesus' nectar.

(MarthaWho's Mother in Law looks up from her book)

MARTHA'S MOTHER-IN-LAW:
Huh? Who?

MARTHA'S BROTHER-IN-LAW:
(sounding it out)
Jee-sus' nect-ar.

MARTHA'S MOTHER-IN-LAW:
Cheeses? Who is that?

MARTHA'S BROTHER-IN-LAW:
Exactly, mom. Exactly.

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